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Unplugging Dan Akroyd Unplugged On UFOs |
 Since the final episode of
The Colony on The Discovery Channel, this website has been a shadow of
its former self. Lord knows I've tried to find something on television
to review. A lot of shows ended, which implied to me that other shows
would be beginning, and the only thing I've run across that tickled my
fancy has been Mystery Quest on The History Channel, which has, thus
far, proved to be even more boring and fuller of hockey doo than
Monster Quest was.
I started playing games on the internet to relieve the tedium of a
season of television shows not worth making fun of. I kind of like
Mobster World on Twitter, because it's about making money and mayhem.
I'm having trouble relating to YoVille on Facebook, because it's about
dressing up and decorating houses. (In real life, new people I meet
think I'm the school nurse at a local junior high because I found a lot
of scrub tops with the school logo for sale at a thrift shop for 50
cents each.) But what DID appeal to me about YoVille is the idea that
you can "buy" some virtual crap and resell it later to suckers for very
much crap fake virtual money. Halloween will end, but I suspect that YoVillians' desire for windows that look like there is a storm outside will be eternal.
The game suddenly seemed more fun to me when there was the possibility
of taking advantage of someone on the table.. Unfortunately, I was
going to need "YoCash" to purchase certain desirable Halloween items on
YoVille. "YoCash" can only be obtained by purchasing it (not going to
happen), filling out 50 page long internet surveys (not going to
happen), or signing up for things like a Netflix trial. That appealed
to me, since I'd considered doing it, anyhow. Netflix has a FABULOUS
documentary section. Two days and many virtual
storming-outside-but-not-inside windows later, I got my first DVD in
the mail....
Dan Aykroyd Unplugged on UFOs
I enjoyed Dan Aykroyd in the early episodes of Saturday Night
Live...well, I enjoyed the early episodes of Saturday Night Live and
Dan Aykroyd was in them. I am known to enthusiastically bow-bow-bow
along when "Rubber Biscuit" comes on my car radio and I'm alone. I'd
lost track of Dan over the years because he apparently has some sort of
little serious acting career, and I have no interest in serious
acting. I did not know that Dan Aykroyd was an expert on UFOs, but
apparently he is. He's like the B-list (OK, C-list) celebrity
spokesperson for the existence of flying saucers, sort of the same way
that Captain Stubing from The Love Boat used to lend questionable
legitimacy to the PTL Club.
Dan Aykroyd Unplugged on UFOs opens with the director, David Sereda,
another UFO expert, who incidentally has an internet petition you can
sign if you would like the government to send David Sereda into space
(something we should all consider signing), informing us that he knew
he HAD to make a movie that was just Dan Aykroyd talking about UFOs
because listening to Dan Aykroyd
talk about UFOs is like listening to Einstein talk about UFOs if
Einstein had ever decided that UFOs were worth talking about.
In spite of David Sereda's claims, Dan Aykroyd isn't particularly
Einstein-like. He is plenty personable and he seems to be fairly
passionate. He also smokes like a chimney. Oh my God. I've vowed to
never smoke in my dwelling again, so I was forced to pause the DVD
several times for a smoke break. Every two minutes, Dan twinkles
wisely at the camera and fires up a smoke with a wooden kitchen match.
It's like watching a Dennis Leary concert, but it isn't funny. Between
lighting ups, Dan Aykroyd proceeds to tell us...nothing new. It's a
rehash of stuff I'd already heard, and I'm no UFO expert. Anybody who
wants to be declared a genius should go talk to David Sereda.
Blab blab, Dan talks while David asks him questions, everybody
important they can think of to trot out gets trotted out, including
Gordon Cooper, Gemini astronaut, who was actually dead by the time the
DVD came out and who seems to already be a corpse during
the interview. I fall asleep, wake up, curse, and have to find my place on
the DVD, which is no easy feat on a DVD that is mostly one person talking. There are lots of fabulous UFO photos, most of which were
produced by internationally-known Swiss hoaxer Billy Meier. There are
lots of UFO videos, and Dan Aykroyd tells us we have to SURELY believe
THOSE. I mean, they are VIDEOS. Anybody ever see the video of the UFO
buzzing the World Trade Center prior to September 11th? Anyone? Look
it up. It's amazing. Just jaw-dropping. And IT NEVER HAPPENED.
I assume that the title of this video, Dan Aykroyd Unplugged on UFOs,
comes from Dan having to be unplugged from his oxygen machine to talk
to us for 80 minutes. I give this movie 2 Kitchen Matches out of a
possible 5.
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